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Mexico Guru

Top 10 ways to know you’ve been vacationing
in Puerto Vallarta too long


#10
Foreigners ask you for directions...and you actually know where to send them.

#9
In spite of a variety of places to dine, you end up at the Hard Rock Cafe and pay more for a hamburger and fries than you would at home.

#8
AND you buy a Hard Rock Vallarta T-shirt.

#7
The pod of whales you see on your sightseeing cruise reminds you of the neighbors down the block at home.

#6
You throw the used toilet paper in the trash can, not the toilet.

#5
You dream of a tall dairy-free latte (extra foam) from Starbucks; your pillow is wet with drool.

#4
The shoeshine man in the plaza now recognizes you and waves at you when you stroll by.

#3
Selling time shares seems like a viable career path.

#2
The only footwear you’ll even consider is a pair of flip flops.

#1
You visit the Remax Real Estate office, and then call your parents and ask for your inheritance early.